So this past Sunday I decide to go to church again at His Way in Orange County. While many said God is practical and they wouldn't do it, I happened to feel God would want me to go and drive to get what I needed. I instantly thought I drive an hour to go to my favorite restaurant, I drive 2 hours to meet with clients, I drive an hour to see my family, so why wouldn't I drive to be in the presence of God?
I find it interesting how much we will do for ourselves but how little we will do for Him, we do not like to be inconvenienced. Anyway I go back down there and boy was it worth it. It was a little different than last time, God's presence came in a different way. (God has been showing me all the ways he manifests Himself so I can learn to recognize it) Praise and worship as usual but this time the air wasn't getting thick, I wasn't feeling the same thing and I thought what is going on? God this is weird. Funny how we think he will always come the same way. Pastor Rob comes up grabs the microphone and says "Did you feel the presence of God just come into the room?" I am like ummm no, then a second later I burst into tears and uncontrollably I start sobbing. Now it was that pain staking sob (you know what I am talking about?) its not something that happens often and definitely not to me, I am one who has a hard time showing emotion in tears let alone I would NEVER do it in public. Rob says "God wants to take over is that okay?" of course we say yes, about that time I noticed others had tears in their eyes, well I guess I did feel when God came in the room but he did not come in the same way as last time.
Rob goes on to talk about the bondage of "Rejection" and how many things we suffer from are because we do not want to be rejected. (Oh probably should mention the girl who sings was saying God was showing her BIG oak trees that where in front of us and God could not get to us so he was going to chop them down with His sword) Me personally it hit hard because I have a problem with "man pleasing spirit and the fear of man". The Lord showed me a few days early that I shut down when certain non believers come into the room and I was devastated and instantly bound up the man pleasing spirit and loosed from heaven the God pleasing spirit in Jesus name. So the root of it all was something I didn't even think about which was rejection. So after all this talk about everything I needed to hear and so did many others in the room, still I was crying but it was time for an altar. Rob said God wanted him to have one so we can give him our fear of rejection and he could in turn give us the acceptance and love from Jesus.
To the praise of the glory of His grace wherein He has made us accepted in the beloved - Ephesians 1:6 KJV
God was telling me I needed to accept his love and acceptance in Jesus name. Jesus was rejected so I could be accepted by God and once I received it I would no longer need to please man but in turn would please God.
Im up front still sobbing away holding my arms up praising His name when I stopped crying, FINALLY! God gave me that seed of acceptance and His love. Up front was the offering bucket and I of course am about to give it all when I hear God say "I know you are willing give but it's time for you to receive". Finally the title of my blog post makes sense right?? LOL the grand finally of this all is in me seeking and seeking God driving 1 1/12 hrs, making the effort for Him and in turn He really wanted to give something to me.
How awesome is God? We seek and seek Him at any cost and He pays me back with a loosing of a chain? Is it worth it? YES YES YES! I made the right decision and in turn I learned a valuable lesson.
We need to make sure that we are not only giving our all to God but we stop and receive what God wants to give to us. God wants us to have complete freedom in Jesus but I never stopped to receive, I was too busy doing, doing, doing and more doing which there was nothing wrong with it but what happens when you have nothing else to give??? Who is going to refuel you?? Who has unlimited resources?? God!!!! It reminded me of a sermon by Joyce Meyer where she said, God will not require you to give something out until you have received it yourself. You cannot give mercy if you have not received it from God, you cannot give love if you have not received it from God, you cannot give compassion until you get compassion from God and not only receiving it but accepting it. It's all there, God gives it to us in Jesus name for FREE! Have you taken the opportunity to ask God what you have not received or accepted yet? Have you stopped giving for just a moment to see what God wants to give you??
If not then I suggest you do that. If you are like me and just want to help everyone for Jesus sake that's GREAT! I fall more and more in love with God each day and in turn want to do more and more for His kingdom and purpose but you also need to relax and receive from Him. He has many bondage's to break and more and more freedoms to give but if we do not stop for a moment we may miss them or prolong them. Everything in His perfect timing Right!!
Father God I thank you for all the freedoms you give in Jesus name. I thank you Jesus for being rejected so I can be accepted and loved by you. I ask that you make everyone who reads this more aware of not only giving but receiving. A healthy balance of both so you can use each day for your purpose. I love you and thank you for your sacrifice and the cost you paid so I can gain freedom. I love you Lord more and more each day! In Jesus name Amen!
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